I can clearly remember the simple life. It was back in 2010, when I hadn’t dreamt of writing a book or imagined that I would have my own website. I spent less than 15 minutes a day on social media. Over fifteen years later, only the last statement is true. A quick check shows that I have over 50 books on Amazon, I’m signed with a publisher, and my website has undergone a complete overhaul in the past year.
Yet I receive around ten emails each day, offering to help sell my books, fix errors on my website, and address other urgent issues, such as my Google Cloud account, which has reached capacity and is about to be closed. Thousands of images will be lost forever. What a time-suck these emails are. I’ve never needed to use Google Cloud and can’t foresee a situation where I ever will.
The examples below have been adjusted for grammatical errors. One thing these emails have in common is that they’re poorly written.
Hi Ted, I hope you are doing well. Many authors face challenges unrelated to the quality of their writing. Common issues include Low visibility — the right readers simply are not discovering the book. Few reviews — which affects reader trust and buying decisions. Slow sales after launch — momentum drops without ongoing promotion. Unclear positioning — readers do not quickly understand why the book is for them. Limited promotional content — making it harder to capture attention online.My work focuses on practical, results-focused support that helps solve these problems. This may include:Improving how your book is positioned so readers quickly see its value. Creating engaging promotional content that draws attention. Encouraging reader interaction and reviews to build credibility. Supporting long-term visibility, not just short-term promotion.If this kind of support would be helpful, I would be glad to share a simple idea tailored to your book. Would you like me to send more details, or is now not the right time? Warm regards,
Hi tedtayler.co.uk Team,I noticed something interesting while browsing your website. I believe you would like to rank at the top of search results for keywords related to your site. I found several SEO issues on your website, including broken links, slow page speed, HTML validation errors, and images without ALT text, which are preventing you from getting that traffic. It's apparent that you have used AdWords to promote your business in the past; however, your website does receive some organic search traffic. I believe I can significantly increase that portion of organic traffic.How about I fix those and promote you through engaging content on relevant platforms (e.g., social media)? I guarantee you will see a significant improvement in your search rankings and traffic once these issues are fixed. Also, this is a one-time payment, so there is no monthly AdWords fee. Is this something you are interested in? If yes, please allow me to send you a no-obligation keyword research report and quote. Hoping to hear from you and take this partnership ahead. Kind Regards,
In case you wondered what certain actors or sports stars did when they weren’t entertaining you in the cinema or on TV, I’ve heard from Willem Dafoe, Jennifer Lawrence, Alex Hales, and Ben Stokes offering their services to help improve my website or sell more books. Who knew?
The emails are annoying, make me smile on occasion, but have no value whatsoever. I hoped they might pester me for a while and give up once they realised every email address they send me gets blocked. But they keep coming.
There might be one small chink in their armour, though. Yesterday, I heard from Jessica. There was no long-winded explanation of what she could do to turn my books into best-sellers. Her only question was –
Don’t you want to sell more of your books? Or have you just given up?
No doubt tomorrow will bring more Daily Drivel. If you’re suffering from the same type of requests, please delete them and ignore any sensational claims these so-called experts make.
I’ll be back next month with another update on this complex life.
Best wishes,
Ted Tayler